The rawness of heart.

I'm learning that if you let just a small lie slip in your heart, it'll take over. Funny that I wasn't even feeling any of this stuff yesterday. So much can change in your heart from day-to-day. But I think I just woke up feeling attacked. I'm learning to lean on God, and it's a lot harder than you think it would be. But every day my prayer is, God let me fall more in love with you than yesterday. Whenever I feel emptiness in my heart I'm always asking God to come and fill the emptiness with His love.

I'm starting to learn how broken I really am, and how desperite I am in need of a savior, and how much I need His love. There's so much crap that comes up in my heart every day, and I know in order to change me all the impurities have to come to the surface, and boy are they COMING TO THE SURFACE.

I guess my prayer in this season is God help me to lean on you, because in reality You are the only one that is strong enough to hold me up. I need to push everything else aside, and learn how to partner with my God who holds my heart like no other ever could or ever should.

I think God's just using my time in Africa to grow my heart like no other time in my life, and He's doing it at such a rapid pace I think it's sometimes hard to handle, and I feel like I'm going to explode.

But. It will be worth it all. I believe it.